Hello, men. Haven’t we all at some point wondered exactly how many miniature Japanese coffee cans we could fill up with our fresh, hot urine? Now, thanks to Sega’s “urinal gaming system” AKA Toylet (genius naming, BTW)– from Japan of course– you needn’t entertain any uncertainty in this regard for much longer.
NAISU! Apparently 685 ml is the high score to beat. Beer works very well, in my experience. In case you’re still confused, the idea is that you piss on an electronic target and you’re marked for your accuracy. The more highbrow and cosmopolitan among you may notice that Sega has also managed to hijack and debase Hokusai’s classic prints of Mount Fuji for a coffee-piddling game. There’s a whole kawaii site about Toylet hosted by the Mannekin Pis, which people in Asia seem to be totally obsessed with, incidentally; I remember seeing replicas and souvenirs of it everywhere from Hong Kong to Tokyo. Even if you don’t read Japanese, check out the instruction page for some great kawaii graphics and this page for more gameplay videos, including a euphemistic clash of gushing “milk” between the current urinator and his predecessor at the urinal and the inevitable smutty fanservice game where you try to blow a woman’s skirt up to see her knickers. Japan, I fink U freeky and I like you a lot.
Sega only makes these machines for urinals. Sorry, ladies, you’re out of luck unless you’ve really been practising.
Now you know something about the Toylet, let’s all enjoy this commercial in which Brad Pitt– a serial Japanese advertising whore– shills coffee in miniature cans.
Yeah. After a tough day at the office, Brad likes to chug a can of my wee wee. Well… anybody’s wee wee actually. Fill em up. He ain’t fussy.